RESOURCES
Conflict in Fiction
& Popular Culture
Conflict is the heart of any fictional story. And conflict is the part of the story that gets you big laughs at a party. Conflicts sell. Incompetence sells. Inadequate relationships sell. Stories about skillfully managing conflict– big yawn.
BUT (big but), your life is not fiction. Your conflict is not in a novel. If you’re living in a conflict, being conflict competent is the opposite of boring. Conflict competencies are essential life skills.
I analyze the conflict incompetence in fiction and popular culture as conflict competence practice. Since conflict is in all good fiction, it’s great conflict analysis practice. And fun too.
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
August 21, 2025
Move over Margaret Atwood and George Orwell. Kurt Vonnegut Jr. is another imaginer of future history whose sci-fi story parallels unfolding news. Player Piano, published in 1952, anticipated today's hopes and fears. In this story-world, algorithms replaced decision-making and AI replaced workers.
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
May 25, 2018
This short story was my 2005 birthday gift to a friend. In 2008, mediate.com made an exception to its nonfiction content rules to publish it. In 2013, I added it to my first website, conflictcompetence.com, which became this URL in 2017. Somehow, that 2013 post got lost, so I'm reposting it now.
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
January 21, 2018
Anyone else feeling inundated with endless stories of unsavoury behaviour? January enflames as if Santa delivered lumps of coal named rocket, collusion, accusation, harassment, misconduct, allegation, fabrication, confabulation, political polarization, melting polar icecap, tweetstorm, snowstorm, firestorm, mudslide, dirt, and doomsday.
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
July 26, 2017
Examples of good, bad and ugly conflict in popular culture.
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
October 8, 2015
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
March 30, 2014
Death brushed me again, but couldn’t keep a skeletal hand on me. Stunned at the close escape, I clung to the mountain side as eight horses stampeded within an inch of me on the narrow dirt path. Their galloping hooves pounded choking clouds of dust into my eyes and lungs...
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
January 14, 2014
Rick says to Ilsa: I’m no good at being noble, but it doesn’t take much to see that the problems of three little people don’t amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world. Then, Rick gets noble and becomes a bean that matters on a hill of beans. Cynical Rick? A hero? What the …?
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
December 3, 2013
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
July 22, 2013
For anyone who missed Angelina Jolie's May 14, 2013, NY Times Op-Ed My Medical Choice, she announced her prophylactic (preventative) mastectomies. Now that people have stopped asking my opinion about her letter, I have an answer to the questions I'd dodged.
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
July 7, 2013
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
June 26, 2013
This weekend we were environmental refugees. It happened so fast. On my commute home across the Bow River foot bridge June 21, I marveled at the water’s height, speed and ferocity, and took a video. Twenty-four hours later the spot I’d videoed was under six feet of water.
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
March 13, 2013
Two years since this wild cancer ride started. With Triple Negative, I’ve another six years before the highest risk is reduced. How hard can it be to stay alive six more years? So, here's the conflict management connection: when I couldn't be or have society's 'ideal' whatever, in this case 'beauty' I adapted my own ideal.
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
March 7, 2013
How suspicious I’ve become of a plastic bottle of goo. Two years ago I was decisive – in and out of a store in minutes. Now, I squint at the tiny font, comparing ingredients lists to lists of toxic chemicals to avoid. Sheesh, I can't pronounce most of the chemicals offered to make my hair shine and my skin not.
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
March 1, 2013
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
December 15, 2012
In prior posts mentioning Decker, I mention stumbling upon the love of my life at age 58 as an aside, as if Decker guiding me through the cancer swamp was expected because he’s an old stalwart. Reality check: we’re a new couple. He didn’t have much invested in ‘us’ when my breasts tried to kill me...
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
November 27, 2012
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
November 25, 2012
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
November 24, 2012
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
November 15, 2012
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
November 11, 2012
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
November 11, 2012
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
November 9, 2012
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
November 6, 2012
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
November 5, 2012
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
November 4, 2012
Here's my list of the great things about a double mastectomy.
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
December 31, 2008
On Sunday, a group of 25 senior citizens gathered to watch a 1934 movie about a family torn apart by conflict over 15 years. In summary, the conflict was between a mother, M, and her daughter-in-law, S. The rift got deeper and uglier...
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Conflict Competence
April 2, 2026
No one’s born with an instruction manual for conflict, or a hot line to conflict tech support. When you practice intentionally using your conversational competencies, you’re practicing your conflict competencies.
The Cassandra files
September 12, 2025
It’s hard to prove what didn’t happen. There's no do-over to prove that if you'd done something else you'd like the result better. How do you measure success or evaluate outcomes when you cannot prove what didn’t happen?
Conflict Doctor answers your questions
September 12, 2025
Question: A parent asked about his child’s recent public meltdown. As the Conflict Doctor, I squirmed, anticipating a parenting question that I’m not qualified to answer. Instead, he admitted his immature overreaction was the low point of the scene.
Conflict in fiction and popular culture
August 21, 2025
Move over Margaret Atwood and George Orwell. Kurt Vonnegut Jr. is another imaginer of future history whose sci-fi story parallels unfolding news. Player Piano, published in 1952, anticipated today's hopes and fears. In this story-world, algorithms replaced decision-making and AI replaced workers.
Conflict Competence
January 5, 2025
Are you tempted to be aggressive towards an adversary in hopes of achieving your preferred conflict outcome. In the podcast, I suggest other approaches that are more likely to get the result you want.
Conflict Competence
November 23, 2024
People who attend courses about managing conflicts report that they love the interactive experience, are excited about the skills they learn, give glowing testimonials to the instructors, see value in the material, and ... and then what? The follow up isn't encouraging.
Conflict Competence
January 25, 2021
Youths hang out online, where they can hang up, close the browser, switch tabs, open another app, flame an adversary in social media, block/ghost/gaslight, or log out. We know how to avoid conflict. Avoiding conflict rarely teaches anything useful for healthy and positive relationships. So, what are other options?
The Cassandra files
January 10, 2021
Societies are in hot disagreements over what limits on freedom are reasonable. Authorities emphasize reasonable limits as the answer. Protesters emphasize freedom. Traditional who, what, where, when and why questions don't ask: how do protesters define freedom?
The Cassandra files
October 1, 2020
A job ad I don't want to see. If you heard a pitch for a reality TV game show called Who is the Next Top Judge, would you watch?